Monday, March 15, 2010

Because Why Would I Give You Interesting, When There Is So Much Weird?

As a nice counterbalance to the wide variety of craptastic events last week, Rose sent me this award. It made my day.

According to the rules of this award, I'm supposed to list 7 interesting things about myself. But since when I'm getting to know people, I most enjoy ferreting out out their bizarre little quirks and weird chapters from their pasts... that's what I'm going to share instead.

Consider it a random act of kindness. This list should make you feel much better about yourself.

1. I don't like metal utensils. My long, painful history with dental work has left me with a horror of anything metal in my mouth. If it weren't for trying to pretend I'm all normal and well-adjusted, and also the fact that it's damn hard to cut meat with a plastic knife, I'd use plastic utensils all the time. I absolutely have to use a plastic spoon for certain foods (yogurt, ice-cream, pudding); everything else I use metal for but am scrupulously careful never to let it touch my teeth. If somebody around me scrapes their fork on their teeth, I wince and have a minor breakdown back in a dark corner of my brain. Also, somewhere a fairy dies.

2. I seem to be incapable of putting on my clothes right-side-out. There have been way too many (more than four - that's all I'm admitting to) instances of people telling me gently in public that my shirt's on inside out. This may have its roots in a body image meltdown I had awhile back that culminated in my cutting out the tags in all of my clothes so that the sizes on the tags would stop taunting me. Add that to my general blindness without my glasses on, and you get an inability to discern which side of the shirt goes against my skin.

3. I'm kind of a freak about pronunciation. If Tom ever leaves me, it will because I've corrected his pronunciation one time too many. I know it's rude. I try really hard not to do it, and I never do it with friends or acquaintances. But here's the thing... if Tom mispronounces a word consistently, then the kids will start pronouncing it that way. So, really, my correcting him is simply good parenting. I'm doing it for the children.

4. I can take absolutely any medical symptom and diagnose myself with either cancer or appendicitis.

5. One of my favorite smells is dirt.

6. I worked as a butcher for two summers during college. One of my duties was to hose all the blood off the walls after the head meat-cutters went home for the day. (Note: not as glamorous as it sounds).

7. I quite enjoy bugs. This will no doubt amuse my parents, who lived through many years of my shrill screams and histrionics when I encountered a stray Daddy Long-legs in the shower or an errant earwig who traveled inside in our rolled-up newspaper. Now suddenly I've turned into the weirdo who transports bugs outside on an index card rather than kill them. Except mosquitoes. Mosquitoes I squish with malicious zeal.

I'm tagging Meg, Dawn, Lora, smalltownmom, and Cindy. Post the award on your blog and list seven interesting (or weird! I encourage weird!) things about yourself, and link back to me.


smalltownmom said...

Thanks Jenn, I hope I can come up with something interesting!

Jen said...

Congrats on the award! If I didn't know you, I'd think you were a whack-job (in the most loving sort of way!!) hehe

Nana said...

You've got to be kidding me. You transport bugs outside on an index card instead of screaming and shaking in fear because there's a little bug in the house??? I never thought I'd see the day!

Your clothing tag issues go all the way back to when you lived at home. I knew you'd want your blog friends to know that.

Thank you for not blaming me for your nutso issues. :)

Jen on the Edge said...

Great, now I can never eat or speak around you when we finally meet. :-)

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

You're not weird at all! Metal--I'm the same way about WOOD in my mouth--ick! But I do love the smell of dirt, too.
If you ever figure out the benefit of mosquitoes, let me know.

Lora said...

Thank you. I'm honored. :)

And, I had no idea about the metal utensils/pronunciation thing. I must have driven you crazy in college.

Anonymous said...

Great job on the award! Thanks for giving it to me, too. I'll be sure to post about it tomorrow.

Also, I too love the smell of dirt. Makes me happy. And I feel the same way about metal utensils on teeth, but probably not in as extreme a way as you.

Cindy said...

Thanks, Jenn. I'll share my weirdness in a few days!

Susan said...

I correct my husband, too. Mostly names, though because he would be humiliated to call Meryle Streep Meryle Street in front of someone - right?

Anonymous said...

Interesting stuff! I like the odd things about people too. For my symptoms, it's always a brain tumor or a heart attack. I should be a doctor. ;-)