Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The Many Faces of Tubing, version Bear

...Co-Starring Bear's Friend...
#1. Anticipation:

#2. Excitement:

#3. Glee:

#4. Adrenaline Rush (with a side of Hysterical Screaming):
#5. Mild Consternation
#6. Breathless:
#7. The Hanging-On Like Grim Death:
#8. Happy Exhaustion

Repeat as necessary until child is tired to the point of going to bed an hour early. Enjoy!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Bug on Bugs

Bug is, unfortunately, a mosquito magnet just like her mother. Place the two of us in a crowd of twenty people, and the mosquitoes will bypass every other person in order to suck our blood, which is, apparently, the Dom Perignon of blood. Or, at the very least, a better grade of crack.

However, despite being chewed relentlessly by the buzzy little bloodsuckers, Bug refuses to kill them.

"AAAAAARRRG!! Moooooommm!!! It's biting me!!!" she'll shriek, staring with horror at the insect blissfully sucking away on her arm.

"Then KILL it," I tell her, not inclined to cross the yard to swat a damn mosquito.

"AAAARG!" she replies, waving her arms like a crazy person.

Now not wanting to kill crunchy insects? I get that. I lived in Tucson, where we would occasionally get cockroaches or Palo Verde beetles the size of small cars in the house. And I would empty a whole can of Raid on one of those before I would smash it and hear the sickening crunch of its exoskeleton.

Ladybugs and cute little spiders that wander into our house? I happily transport them to the front door and set them free.

But mosquitoes? Blood-sucking and crunch-free? SMASH.

So it was illuminating, the other evening, when Bug finally shared the reason for her reluctance in bug-killing. She was curled into a chair next to me, wrapped in her fuzzy pink robe and reading "Calvin and Hobbes", when she suddenly said,

"Mom? You know how I won't kill bugs? Here's how I think about it. I think about some giant squeezing all the inside parts out of a person. And I think how that's what I would be doing to that bug. And that would be a horrible way to die, don't you think?"

I had to agree. It would be a horrible way to die.

But it's not going to stop me from killing mosquitoes.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Out to Camp

It was NOT an auspicious lake day. The sky was the same moody, cloudy expanse that we've been confronted with for a month now. The lake, instead of a sparkling, inviting blue, had the dull gray gleam of pewter. The trees and hills on the opposite shore were green and blue smudges in the mist. But! It was NOT raining. And at this point, we're taking what we can get.

One of Bear's friends hosts a grand sleepover at her family's camp every summer. (In Maine, a lake cottage is called a camp. It took me my whole first summer to figure that out. I just thought I was meeting a lot of weird people who went to summer camp with their kids). Her friend's brave, brave mother not only has a passel of girls spend the night but also invites their families to come spend the next day at the lake. She is what you might call a saint.

Hey, how many preteen girls does it take to paddle a canoe? Three. Two to paddle, and one to beat off the pesky boys with a swim noodle. Naturally.

The first summer Bear went, she was seven. She was so timid that, even wearing a life jacket, she was barely willing to dog-paddle out to the float. Once there, she sat terrified on the float while her friends leapt willy-nilly into the lake. Now she's an old hand, and I watched her swimming to and fro, leaping not only off the float, but the dock, and, at one particularly random point, out of a canoe. Which didn't seem to serve any purpose that I could see. But, hey. Not judging.I helped Bug into her life jacket, but she stayed uncertainly in the shallows.. Despite swimming confidently in pools, she wasn't too sure about swimming out to the float with the other kids. (I'm thinking we've been watching a few too many "Monsters of the Deep" documentaries on the Discovery Channel).When her sister sailed happily by doing THIS,
I saw pure envy in Bug's eyes and asked her if she wanted to try a kayak.
"No."
five seconds...

"Maybe...well, no."

two seconds...

"OK, I guess I'll try it. Except I don't know how to paddle, so...no."

one second...

"Maaaaaaaybe...."

I dragged a kayak into the shallows and helped her climb on it. Positioning the paddle in front of her, I showed her how to move it and what to do to turn. She easily demonstrated both skills, then said, "I don't know..." and started to waver. At which point I grabbed the back of the kayak and shoved. I mean, yes, there's a point where you need to hold your kid's hand and let them take their time, but there's also a point where you teach them what they need to know and then push them out onto the lake.

She LOVED it. At first I would only let her paddle halfway to the float and back until she was comfortable maneuvering the kayak. Soon she was able to go out and around the float. By the time we left that afternoon, she was confidently paddling three camps down the lake and back and begging to go farther.
We also went tubing that afternoon, but since I took...um...quite a few photos that day, I haven't had time to photo-edit them all. Tubing will be another day's post. (Fine, 1011. I took 1011 photos. And that's my brother's fault because he bought me the super-big capacity memory card. I don't have a problem or anything. Really).

Friday, July 3, 2009

See Bug Read

Scene: Last night. Nine-year-old Bug is reading on the living room couch, while Tom and I sat chatting at the dinner table.

Bug: Hey, Dad, what does "litigate" mean?

Tom: To take legal action against someone.

Bug: Ohhhh. What about "paleolithic"?

Tom: Um, like, prehistoric.

Bug (chuckles): OK. Heh. That's funny.

(ten seconds later)

Bug: What about "indigenous"?

Tom: WHAT are you reading?

Bug: The Far Side. It's this really funny comic book I found downstairs.
Funny, and apparently, educational!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Weather Detente

Yesterday:

Today? Drizzly. Pfffffft.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

27/30

We have had rain for 27 out of the last 30 days here. This has had a four-pronged effect:

1. The girls are heartily sick of craft projects, TV, Wii, and board games.

2. I am unable to remember what the sun looks like. And the sky? Didn't it used to be blue?

3. My garden, though slug-infested to the extreme, is growing extravagantly. I can only assume the weeds are doing the same, but my diligence in gardening ends at weeding in the rain.

3. My van is really, really clean.